I kinda like this one - it's subtle....
....although Cheney the Hutt makes a big impression, too. No doubt he's looking for his Jawas of Mass Destruction.
But can anything top this?
Showing posts with label joke. Show all posts
Showing posts with label joke. Show all posts
Monday, December 03, 2007
Episode V: The Empired Mashed Up
There's some fun stuff going on at worth1000.com. It seems they're running a Star Wars photoshop contest: reimagine any Star Wars character as a celebrity.
I kinda like this one - it's subtle....
....although Cheney the Hutt makes a big impression, too. No doubt he's looking for his Jawas of Mass Destruction.
But can anything top this?
I kinda like this one - it's subtle....
....although Cheney the Hutt makes a big impression, too. No doubt he's looking for his Jawas of Mass Destruction. But can anything top this?
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Monday, June 18, 2007
Tuesday, June 05, 2007
Sunday, May 27, 2007
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Sunday, May 13, 2007
Saturday, May 12, 2007
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
The Best Headline Ever
Associated Press wins the award for a story about high-wire artists crossing a river in South Korea. The headline:
Skywalkers in Korea cross Han solo.
Tuesday, May 08, 2007
Trust Me, This is Funny
I really can't explain this.... you have to experience it for yourself.
Trek. Cats. Mangled English. Nothing more needs to be said.
Just click here.
Trek. Cats. Mangled English. Nothing more needs to be said.
Just click here.
Friday, May 04, 2007
Wednesday, May 02, 2007
The Spam Chronicles 9
FROM DESK OF MR ADAMA BELLO.
AUDITING AND ACCOUNTING UNIT.
BANK OF AFRICA(BOA)
OUAGADOUGOU BURKINA-FASO.
I AM ADAMA BELLO THE DIRECTOR IN CHARGE OF AUDITING AND ACCOUNTING SECTION OF BANK OF AFRICA, (BOA) OUAGADOUGOU BURKINA-FASO COULD YOU PLEASE CONSIDER TO HELP ME TO RELOCATE THIS SUM OF TEN MILLION,FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS(US$10.5m)
THIER WHERE 10.5 MILLION DOLLARS WAS DEPOSITED IN OUR BANK BY Mr Joan Smith AN AMERICA CITIZEN WHO DIED IN A PLANE CRASH IN 2000.
WE HAVE TRIED TO CONTACT HER IMMEDIATE FAMILY TO COME FORWARD FOR CLAIMS BUT COULD NOT SUCCEED.WE DISCORVERED THAT THE LATE AMERICAN DIED ALONG SIDE WITH HES WIFE AND CHILDREN WHO ARE SUPPOSED TO BE HER NEXT OF KIN.
ON SMOOTH CONCLUSION OF THIS TRANSACTION, YOU WILL BE ENTITLED TO 40% OF THE TOTAL SUM AS GRATIFICATION, WHILE 5% WILL BE SET ASIDE TO TAKE CARE OF EXPENSES THAT MAY ARISE DURING THE TIME OF TRANSFER AND ALSO TELEPHONE BILLS, WHILE 55% WILL BE FOR ME. PLEASE, YOU HAVE BEEN ADVICED TO KEEP "TOP SECRET.
CLICKHERE(http://www.cnn.com/2000/US/02/01/alaska.airlines.list/).
I WILL GIVE YOU ALL VITAL INFORMATION CONCERNING THE AMERICAN AND THE
10.5MILLION DOLLARS IN OUR CUSTODY SO THAT YOU WILL CONTACT OUR BANK
FOR THEM TO RELEASE THE MONEY TO YOU.
YOU CAN COME HERE IN PERSON OR YOU CAN REQUEST THE BANK TO SHIP THE
FUNDS TO YOU IN YOUR COUNTRY DIPLOMATICALY.
I AM THE DIRECTOR IN CHARGE OF AUDITING AND ACCOUNTING SECTION,I WILL PLAY A ROLE TO MAKE SURE THAT THE 10.5 MILLION DOLLARS IS RELEASED TO YOU. AS SOON AS I RECIEVE YOUR REPLY,I WILL GIVE YOU A DRAFT APPLICATION WHICH YOU WILL FORWARD TO OUR BANK.
REPLY AND LET ME KNOW YOUR FULL NAME,AGE,ADDRESS,OCCUPATION,YOUR AND FAX NUMBERS IF AVALIABLE.
I AWAIT YOUR URGENT REPLY.
MR.Adama Bello
Good God, Adama, I have no time for this. From what your associate Starbuck, or whatever the hell his name was, was saying, les federales are on to you and I can't be involved.
You're on your own.
You never saw me. I was never here.
John
AUDITING AND ACCOUNTING UNIT.
BANK OF AFRICA(BOA)
OUAGADOUGOU BURKINA-FASO.
I AM ADAMA BELLO THE DIRECTOR IN CHARGE OF AUDITING AND ACCOUNTING SECTION OF BANK OF AFRICA, (BOA) OUAGADOUGOU BURKINA-FASO COULD YOU PLEASE CONSIDER TO HELP ME TO RELOCATE THIS SUM OF TEN MILLION,FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS(US$10.5m)
THIER WHERE 10.5 MILLION DOLLARS WAS DEPOSITED IN OUR BANK BY Mr Joan Smith AN AMERICA CITIZEN WHO DIED IN A PLANE CRASH IN 2000.
WE HAVE TRIED TO CONTACT HER IMMEDIATE FAMILY TO COME FORWARD FOR CLAIMS BUT COULD NOT SUCCEED.WE DISCORVERED THAT THE LATE AMERICAN DIED ALONG SIDE WITH HES WIFE AND CHILDREN WHO ARE SUPPOSED TO BE HER NEXT OF KIN.
ON SMOOTH CONCLUSION OF THIS TRANSACTION, YOU WILL BE ENTITLED TO 40% OF THE TOTAL SUM AS GRATIFICATION, WHILE 5% WILL BE SET ASIDE TO TAKE CARE OF EXPENSES THAT MAY ARISE DURING THE TIME OF TRANSFER AND ALSO TELEPHONE BILLS, WHILE 55% WILL BE FOR ME. PLEASE, YOU HAVE BEEN ADVICED TO KEEP "TOP SECRET.
CLICKHERE(http://www.cnn.com/2000/US/02/01/alaska.airlines.list/).
I WILL GIVE YOU ALL VITAL INFORMATION CONCERNING THE AMERICAN AND THE
10.5MILLION DOLLARS IN OUR CUSTODY SO THAT YOU WILL CONTACT OUR BANK
FOR THEM TO RELEASE THE MONEY TO YOU.
YOU CAN COME HERE IN PERSON OR YOU CAN REQUEST THE BANK TO SHIP THE
FUNDS TO YOU IN YOUR COUNTRY DIPLOMATICALY.
I AM THE DIRECTOR IN CHARGE OF AUDITING AND ACCOUNTING SECTION,I WILL PLAY A ROLE TO MAKE SURE THAT THE 10.5 MILLION DOLLARS IS RELEASED TO YOU. AS SOON AS I RECIEVE YOUR REPLY,I WILL GIVE YOU A DRAFT APPLICATION WHICH YOU WILL FORWARD TO OUR BANK.
REPLY AND LET ME KNOW YOUR FULL NAME,AGE,ADDRESS,OCCUPATION,YOUR AND FAX NUMBERS IF AVALIABLE.
I AWAIT YOUR URGENT REPLY.
MR.Adama Bello
Good God, Adama, I have no time for this. From what your associate Starbuck, or whatever the hell his name was, was saying, les federales are on to you and I can't be involved.
You're on your own.
You never saw me. I was never here.
John
Monday, April 30, 2007
Thursday, April 26, 2007
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
The Spam Chronicles 8
FROM THE DESK OF MR.IDRIS MUSA.
BILL AND EXCHANGE
FOREIGN REMITTANCE DEPT.
BANK OF AFRICA
( BOA)OUAGADOUGOU,
BURKINA FASO ,
Dear friend,
Compliments, I am the manager of bill and exchange at the foreign remittance department of BANK OF AFRICA. I am writting to seek your coperation over this business deal. In my department, I discovered an abandoned sum of$15million USD(Fifteen million US dollars)only , in an account that belongs to one of our foreign customers who died along with his entire family in a plane crash that took place in Kenya,East Africa,the Late DR. GEORGE BRUMLEY,a citizen of Atlanta,United States of America but naturalised in Burkinafaso,WestAfrica and contractor with ECOWAS,(ECONOMIC COMMUNITY OF WEST AFRICAN STATES) .
Since we got information about his death, we have been expecting his next of kin to come over and claim his money because it cannot be released unless somebody applies for it as next of kin or relation to the deceased as indicated in our banking guidelines but unfortunately , all his supposed next of kin or relation died alongside with him at the plane crash leaving nobody behind for the claim.
It is therefore upon this discovery that I now decided to makethis businness proposal to you and release the money to you via your foreign bank account as the next of kin or relation to the deceased for safety and subsequent disbursement since nobody is coming for it and this money Could go into the Bank treasury as unclaimed Bill. The Banking law and guideline here stipulates that if such money remainedunclamed after four years, the money will betransfered into the Bank treasury as unclaimed fund.The request for your assistance and maximum co-operation as a foreign citizen to stand as the next of kin in this business is occasioned by the fact that the deceased customer was a foreigner and a Burkinabe cannot stand as next of kin to a foreigner.
40 % of this money will be for you as my foreign partner, inrespect to the provision of a foreign account. 10 %will be set aside for expences incured during the business and 50 % would be for me.
There after I will come over to your country for disbursement accoding to the percentages indicated. Therefore to enable the immediate trnansfer of this fund to you as arranged,you must apply first to the bank as the relation or next of kin to the deceased,indicating your claims and wherein the money will be remitted .
Upon receipt of your reply, I will send to you by fax or email the text of application which you will fill and submit to the office of the foreign remittance director of the bank of africa. I will not fail to bring to your notice that this transaction is stricly confidential and i will use my position in this Bank to effect a hitch free transfer of the fund. You should contact me immediately as soon as you receive this letter. Trusting to hear from you immediately.
Please , visit the website below for more informations about the PlaneCrash and the tragic death of the deceased and his entire family, Late DR.GEORGE BRUMLEY. http://www.cnn.com/2003/WORLD/africa/07/20/kenya.crash/index.html
Your’s faithfully,
MR.IDRIS MUSA
Idris, you crazy bastard! Can't you see I'm swamped with requests from your people? Ye gods man, I'm not buried under mountains of vacuous toadies willing to rinse my shoes with their lick-spittle so that they may honour me by performing these menial accounting nonsensicals you keep demanding of me! Sweet festering christ, I'm already working four plane crashes, one tsunami relief scam and two lotteries for you people! Not to mention the Vancouver Canucks -- what a scam if they win the Stanley Cup this year!
No, Idris, they must stop! Hide in the green zone -- you'll be safe there!
Rantingly yours,
John
BILL AND EXCHANGE
FOREIGN REMITTANCE DEPT.
BANK OF AFRICA
( BOA)OUAGADOUGOU,
BURKINA FASO ,
Dear friend,
Compliments, I am the manager of bill and exchange at the foreign remittance department of BANK OF AFRICA. I am writting to seek your coperation over this business deal. In my department, I discovered an abandoned sum of$15million USD(Fifteen million US dollars)only , in an account that belongs to one of our foreign customers who died along with his entire family in a plane crash that took place in Kenya,East Africa,the Late DR. GEORGE BRUMLEY,a citizen of Atlanta,United States of America but naturalised in Burkinafaso,WestAfrica and contractor with ECOWAS,(ECONOMIC COMMUNITY OF WEST AFRICAN STATES) .
Since we got information about his death, we have been expecting his next of kin to come over and claim his money because it cannot be released unless somebody applies for it as next of kin or relation to the deceased as indicated in our banking guidelines but unfortunately , all his supposed next of kin or relation died alongside with him at the plane crash leaving nobody behind for the claim.
It is therefore upon this discovery that I now decided to makethis businness proposal to you and release the money to you via your foreign bank account as the next of kin or relation to the deceased for safety and subsequent disbursement since nobody is coming for it and this money Could go into the Bank treasury as unclaimed Bill. The Banking law and guideline here stipulates that if such money remainedunclamed after four years, the money will betransfered into the Bank treasury as unclaimed fund.The request for your assistance and maximum co-operation as a foreign citizen to stand as the next of kin in this business is occasioned by the fact that the deceased customer was a foreigner and a Burkinabe cannot stand as next of kin to a foreigner.
40 % of this money will be for you as my foreign partner, inrespect to the provision of a foreign account. 10 %will be set aside for expences incured during the business and 50 % would be for me.
There after I will come over to your country for disbursement accoding to the percentages indicated. Therefore to enable the immediate trnansfer of this fund to you as arranged,you must apply first to the bank as the relation or next of kin to the deceased,indicating your claims and wherein the money will be remitted .
Upon receipt of your reply, I will send to you by fax or email the text of application which you will fill and submit to the office of the foreign remittance director of the bank of africa. I will not fail to bring to your notice that this transaction is stricly confidential and i will use my position in this Bank to effect a hitch free transfer of the fund. You should contact me immediately as soon as you receive this letter. Trusting to hear from you immediately.
Please , visit the website below for more informations about the PlaneCrash and the tragic death of the deceased and his entire family, Late DR.GEORGE BRUMLEY. http://www.cnn.com/2003/WORLD/africa/07/20/kenya.crash/index.html
Your’s faithfully,
MR.IDRIS MUSA
Idris, you crazy bastard! Can't you see I'm swamped with requests from your people? Ye gods man, I'm not buried under mountains of vacuous toadies willing to rinse my shoes with their lick-spittle so that they may honour me by performing these menial accounting nonsensicals you keep demanding of me! Sweet festering christ, I'm already working four plane crashes, one tsunami relief scam and two lotteries for you people! Not to mention the Vancouver Canucks -- what a scam if they win the Stanley Cup this year!
No, Idris, they must stop! Hide in the green zone -- you'll be safe there!
Rantingly yours,
John
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
Friday, April 20, 2007
The Spam Chronicles 7
FROM, THE DESK OF DR IDRIS RIMI,
BILL AND EXCHANGE MANAGER,
FOREIGN REMITTANCE DEPARTMENT(BOA).
BANK OF AFRICA,
OUAGADOUGOU,BURKINA FASO.
www.bkofafrica.net
Dear Friend,
How are you doing with your family? Hope fine, Please pay attention and understand my reason of contacting you today through this email, My name is Dr Idris Rimi, Bill and Exchange Manager in Bank Of Africa Ouagadougou Burkina-Faso. In my department, during the Auditing of the year 2006, I discovered an abounded sum of €4.500.000.00 Pounds that belongs to our Late Mr. Morris Thompson, an American prominent man who unfortunately lost his life in the plane crash of Alaska Airlines Flight 261, which crashed on January 31st 2000. You may read more about the crash on visiting this C.N.N News internet website below.
http://archives.cnn.com/2000/US/02/01/alaska.airlines.list/
I desperately need your assistance to secure and move this huge sums of money left behind by my late client to the tune of €4.500.000.00, (Four million five hundred thousand pounds) out from Bank Of Africa Ouagadougou Burkina Faso to your own account, he executed contract through Department of Work and Housing here in Ouagadougou Burkina-Faso and the mentioned money above is his money left in our bank before his death. Meanwhile, for your smoothness of this transaction, I will pay you 30% of the total sum for your co-operation in this matter. If you know that you are interested and capable to handle this business transaction, come up with the information's showed below:-
1. Your Full Name:
2. Your Contact Cell Phone Number:
3. Your Age:
4. Your Sex:
5. Your Occupations:
6. Your Country and City:
As soon as possible all these information's is submitted to me, I will
immediately draft an application form with all your information's and send
back to you, so that you will proceed with the transaction by sending the
form to BOA bank for the transferring of this fund into your account.
Yours Faithfully,
DR IDRIS RIMI.
Holy Crap! Idris, you lousy bastard! Do you want a stool sample, too?
This whole plan sounds like it's plummeting to earth faster than Canada's Kyoto commitments.
You need someone more dark, more black ops than me to make this crazy scheme work. You need a Cheney, a dark and evil oozing menace, who's able to play rough, who can shoot his best friend in the face without blinking or thought.
Me, I'm too far gone for this. I like the quiet life now, I can't do the violence anymore. Maybe that's just my fat belly and the rum talking. And the Diet Coke.
But good luck, pally. You'll need it.
Salut.
John
BILL AND EXCHANGE MANAGER,
FOREIGN REMITTANCE DEPARTMENT(BOA).
BANK OF AFRICA,
OUAGADOUGOU,BURKINA FASO.
www.bkofafrica.net
Dear Friend,
How are you doing with your family? Hope fine, Please pay attention and understand my reason of contacting you today through this email, My name is Dr Idris Rimi, Bill and Exchange Manager in Bank Of Africa Ouagadougou Burkina-Faso. In my department, during the Auditing of the year 2006, I discovered an abounded sum of €4.500.000.00 Pounds that belongs to our Late Mr. Morris Thompson, an American prominent man who unfortunately lost his life in the plane crash of Alaska Airlines Flight 261, which crashed on January 31st 2000. You may read more about the crash on visiting this C.N.N News internet website below.
http://archives.cnn.com/2000/US/02/01/alaska.airlines.list/
I desperately need your assistance to secure and move this huge sums of money left behind by my late client to the tune of €4.500.000.00, (Four million five hundred thousand pounds) out from Bank Of Africa Ouagadougou Burkina Faso to your own account, he executed contract through Department of Work and Housing here in Ouagadougou Burkina-Faso and the mentioned money above is his money left in our bank before his death. Meanwhile, for your smoothness of this transaction, I will pay you 30% of the total sum for your co-operation in this matter. If you know that you are interested and capable to handle this business transaction, come up with the information's showed below:-
1. Your Full Name:
2. Your Contact Cell Phone Number:
3. Your Age:
4. Your Sex:
5. Your Occupations:
6. Your Country and City:
As soon as possible all these information's is submitted to me, I will
immediately draft an application form with all your information's and send
back to you, so that you will proceed with the transaction by sending the
form to BOA bank for the transferring of this fund into your account.
Yours Faithfully,
DR IDRIS RIMI.
Holy Crap! Idris, you lousy bastard! Do you want a stool sample, too?
This whole plan sounds like it's plummeting to earth faster than Canada's Kyoto commitments.
You need someone more dark, more black ops than me to make this crazy scheme work. You need a Cheney, a dark and evil oozing menace, who's able to play rough, who can shoot his best friend in the face without blinking or thought.
Me, I'm too far gone for this. I like the quiet life now, I can't do the violence anymore. Maybe that's just my fat belly and the rum talking. And the Diet Coke.
But good luck, pally. You'll need it.
Salut.
John
Monday, April 16, 2007
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