FROM DESK OF MR ADAMA BELLO.
AUDITING AND ACCOUNTING UNIT.
BANK OF AFRICA(BOA)
OUAGADOUGOU BURKINA-FASO.
I AM ADAMA BELLO THE DIRECTOR IN CHARGE OF AUDITING AND ACCOUNTING SECTION OF BANK OF AFRICA, (BOA) OUAGADOUGOU BURKINA-FASO COULD YOU PLEASE CONSIDER TO HELP ME TO RELOCATE THIS SUM OF TEN MILLION,FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS(US$10.5m)
THIER WHERE 10.5 MILLION DOLLARS WAS DEPOSITED IN OUR BANK BY Mr Joan Smith AN AMERICA CITIZEN WHO DIED IN A PLANE CRASH IN 2000.
WE HAVE TRIED TO CONTACT HER IMMEDIATE FAMILY TO COME FORWARD FOR CLAIMS BUT COULD NOT SUCCEED.WE DISCORVERED THAT THE LATE AMERICAN DIED ALONG SIDE WITH HES WIFE AND CHILDREN WHO ARE SUPPOSED TO BE HER NEXT OF KIN.
ON SMOOTH CONCLUSION OF THIS TRANSACTION, YOU WILL BE ENTITLED TO 40% OF THE TOTAL SUM AS GRATIFICATION, WHILE 5% WILL BE SET ASIDE TO TAKE CARE OF EXPENSES THAT MAY ARISE DURING THE TIME OF TRANSFER AND ALSO TELEPHONE BILLS, WHILE 55% WILL BE FOR ME. PLEASE, YOU HAVE BEEN ADVICED TO KEEP "TOP SECRET.
CLICKHERE(http://www.cnn.com/2000/US/02/01/alaska.airlines.list/).
I WILL GIVE YOU ALL VITAL INFORMATION CONCERNING THE AMERICAN AND THE
10.5MILLION DOLLARS IN OUR CUSTODY SO THAT YOU WILL CONTACT OUR BANK
FOR THEM TO RELEASE THE MONEY TO YOU.
YOU CAN COME HERE IN PERSON OR YOU CAN REQUEST THE BANK TO SHIP THE
FUNDS TO YOU IN YOUR COUNTRY DIPLOMATICALY.
I AM THE DIRECTOR IN CHARGE OF AUDITING AND ACCOUNTING SECTION,I WILL PLAY A ROLE TO MAKE SURE THAT THE 10.5 MILLION DOLLARS IS RELEASED TO YOU. AS SOON AS I RECIEVE YOUR REPLY,I WILL GIVE YOU A DRAFT APPLICATION WHICH YOU WILL FORWARD TO OUR BANK.
REPLY AND LET ME KNOW YOUR FULL NAME,AGE,ADDRESS,OCCUPATION,YOUR AND FAX NUMBERS IF AVALIABLE.
I AWAIT YOUR URGENT REPLY.
MR.Adama Bello
Good God, Adama, I have no time for this. From what your associate Starbuck, or whatever the hell his name was, was saying, les federales are on to you and I can't be involved.
You're on your own.
You never saw me. I was never here.
John
Showing posts with label spam. Show all posts
Showing posts with label spam. Show all posts
Wednesday, May 02, 2007
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
The Spam Chronicles 8
FROM THE DESK OF MR.IDRIS MUSA.
BILL AND EXCHANGE
FOREIGN REMITTANCE DEPT.
BANK OF AFRICA
( BOA)OUAGADOUGOU,
BURKINA FASO ,
Dear friend,
Compliments, I am the manager of bill and exchange at the foreign remittance department of BANK OF AFRICA. I am writting to seek your coperation over this business deal. In my department, I discovered an abandoned sum of$15million USD(Fifteen million US dollars)only , in an account that belongs to one of our foreign customers who died along with his entire family in a plane crash that took place in Kenya,East Africa,the Late DR. GEORGE BRUMLEY,a citizen of Atlanta,United States of America but naturalised in Burkinafaso,WestAfrica and contractor with ECOWAS,(ECONOMIC COMMUNITY OF WEST AFRICAN STATES) .
Since we got information about his death, we have been expecting his next of kin to come over and claim his money because it cannot be released unless somebody applies for it as next of kin or relation to the deceased as indicated in our banking guidelines but unfortunately , all his supposed next of kin or relation died alongside with him at the plane crash leaving nobody behind for the claim.
It is therefore upon this discovery that I now decided to makethis businness proposal to you and release the money to you via your foreign bank account as the next of kin or relation to the deceased for safety and subsequent disbursement since nobody is coming for it and this money Could go into the Bank treasury as unclaimed Bill. The Banking law and guideline here stipulates that if such money remainedunclamed after four years, the money will betransfered into the Bank treasury as unclaimed fund.The request for your assistance and maximum co-operation as a foreign citizen to stand as the next of kin in this business is occasioned by the fact that the deceased customer was a foreigner and a Burkinabe cannot stand as next of kin to a foreigner.
40 % of this money will be for you as my foreign partner, inrespect to the provision of a foreign account. 10 %will be set aside for expences incured during the business and 50 % would be for me.
There after I will come over to your country for disbursement accoding to the percentages indicated. Therefore to enable the immediate trnansfer of this fund to you as arranged,you must apply first to the bank as the relation or next of kin to the deceased,indicating your claims and wherein the money will be remitted .
Upon receipt of your reply, I will send to you by fax or email the text of application which you will fill and submit to the office of the foreign remittance director of the bank of africa. I will not fail to bring to your notice that this transaction is stricly confidential and i will use my position in this Bank to effect a hitch free transfer of the fund. You should contact me immediately as soon as you receive this letter. Trusting to hear from you immediately.
Please , visit the website below for more informations about the PlaneCrash and the tragic death of the deceased and his entire family, Late DR.GEORGE BRUMLEY. http://www.cnn.com/2003/WORLD/africa/07/20/kenya.crash/index.html
Your’s faithfully,
MR.IDRIS MUSA
Idris, you crazy bastard! Can't you see I'm swamped with requests from your people? Ye gods man, I'm not buried under mountains of vacuous toadies willing to rinse my shoes with their lick-spittle so that they may honour me by performing these menial accounting nonsensicals you keep demanding of me! Sweet festering christ, I'm already working four plane crashes, one tsunami relief scam and two lotteries for you people! Not to mention the Vancouver Canucks -- what a scam if they win the Stanley Cup this year!
No, Idris, they must stop! Hide in the green zone -- you'll be safe there!
Rantingly yours,
John
BILL AND EXCHANGE
FOREIGN REMITTANCE DEPT.
BANK OF AFRICA
( BOA)OUAGADOUGOU,
BURKINA FASO ,
Dear friend,
Compliments, I am the manager of bill and exchange at the foreign remittance department of BANK OF AFRICA. I am writting to seek your coperation over this business deal. In my department, I discovered an abandoned sum of$15million USD(Fifteen million US dollars)only , in an account that belongs to one of our foreign customers who died along with his entire family in a plane crash that took place in Kenya,East Africa,the Late DR. GEORGE BRUMLEY,a citizen of Atlanta,United States of America but naturalised in Burkinafaso,WestAfrica and contractor with ECOWAS,(ECONOMIC COMMUNITY OF WEST AFRICAN STATES) .
Since we got information about his death, we have been expecting his next of kin to come over and claim his money because it cannot be released unless somebody applies for it as next of kin or relation to the deceased as indicated in our banking guidelines but unfortunately , all his supposed next of kin or relation died alongside with him at the plane crash leaving nobody behind for the claim.
It is therefore upon this discovery that I now decided to makethis businness proposal to you and release the money to you via your foreign bank account as the next of kin or relation to the deceased for safety and subsequent disbursement since nobody is coming for it and this money Could go into the Bank treasury as unclaimed Bill. The Banking law and guideline here stipulates that if such money remainedunclamed after four years, the money will betransfered into the Bank treasury as unclaimed fund.The request for your assistance and maximum co-operation as a foreign citizen to stand as the next of kin in this business is occasioned by the fact that the deceased customer was a foreigner and a Burkinabe cannot stand as next of kin to a foreigner.
40 % of this money will be for you as my foreign partner, inrespect to the provision of a foreign account. 10 %will be set aside for expences incured during the business and 50 % would be for me.
There after I will come over to your country for disbursement accoding to the percentages indicated. Therefore to enable the immediate trnansfer of this fund to you as arranged,you must apply first to the bank as the relation or next of kin to the deceased,indicating your claims and wherein the money will be remitted .
Upon receipt of your reply, I will send to you by fax or email the text of application which you will fill and submit to the office of the foreign remittance director of the bank of africa. I will not fail to bring to your notice that this transaction is stricly confidential and i will use my position in this Bank to effect a hitch free transfer of the fund. You should contact me immediately as soon as you receive this letter. Trusting to hear from you immediately.
Please , visit the website below for more informations about the PlaneCrash and the tragic death of the deceased and his entire family, Late DR.GEORGE BRUMLEY. http://www.cnn.com/2003/WORLD/africa/07/20/kenya.crash/index.html
Your’s faithfully,
MR.IDRIS MUSA
Idris, you crazy bastard! Can't you see I'm swamped with requests from your people? Ye gods man, I'm not buried under mountains of vacuous toadies willing to rinse my shoes with their lick-spittle so that they may honour me by performing these menial accounting nonsensicals you keep demanding of me! Sweet festering christ, I'm already working four plane crashes, one tsunami relief scam and two lotteries for you people! Not to mention the Vancouver Canucks -- what a scam if they win the Stanley Cup this year!
No, Idris, they must stop! Hide in the green zone -- you'll be safe there!
Rantingly yours,
John
Friday, April 20, 2007
The Spam Chronicles 7
FROM, THE DESK OF DR IDRIS RIMI,
BILL AND EXCHANGE MANAGER,
FOREIGN REMITTANCE DEPARTMENT(BOA).
BANK OF AFRICA,
OUAGADOUGOU,BURKINA FASO.
www.bkofafrica.net
Dear Friend,
How are you doing with your family? Hope fine, Please pay attention and understand my reason of contacting you today through this email, My name is Dr Idris Rimi, Bill and Exchange Manager in Bank Of Africa Ouagadougou Burkina-Faso. In my department, during the Auditing of the year 2006, I discovered an abounded sum of €4.500.000.00 Pounds that belongs to our Late Mr. Morris Thompson, an American prominent man who unfortunately lost his life in the plane crash of Alaska Airlines Flight 261, which crashed on January 31st 2000. You may read more about the crash on visiting this C.N.N News internet website below.
http://archives.cnn.com/2000/US/02/01/alaska.airlines.list/
I desperately need your assistance to secure and move this huge sums of money left behind by my late client to the tune of €4.500.000.00, (Four million five hundred thousand pounds) out from Bank Of Africa Ouagadougou Burkina Faso to your own account, he executed contract through Department of Work and Housing here in Ouagadougou Burkina-Faso and the mentioned money above is his money left in our bank before his death. Meanwhile, for your smoothness of this transaction, I will pay you 30% of the total sum for your co-operation in this matter. If you know that you are interested and capable to handle this business transaction, come up with the information's showed below:-
1. Your Full Name:
2. Your Contact Cell Phone Number:
3. Your Age:
4. Your Sex:
5. Your Occupations:
6. Your Country and City:
As soon as possible all these information's is submitted to me, I will
immediately draft an application form with all your information's and send
back to you, so that you will proceed with the transaction by sending the
form to BOA bank for the transferring of this fund into your account.
Yours Faithfully,
DR IDRIS RIMI.
Holy Crap! Idris, you lousy bastard! Do you want a stool sample, too?
This whole plan sounds like it's plummeting to earth faster than Canada's Kyoto commitments.
You need someone more dark, more black ops than me to make this crazy scheme work. You need a Cheney, a dark and evil oozing menace, who's able to play rough, who can shoot his best friend in the face without blinking or thought.
Me, I'm too far gone for this. I like the quiet life now, I can't do the violence anymore. Maybe that's just my fat belly and the rum talking. And the Diet Coke.
But good luck, pally. You'll need it.
Salut.
John
BILL AND EXCHANGE MANAGER,
FOREIGN REMITTANCE DEPARTMENT(BOA).
BANK OF AFRICA,
OUAGADOUGOU,BURKINA FASO.
www.bkofafrica.net
Dear Friend,
How are you doing with your family? Hope fine, Please pay attention and understand my reason of contacting you today through this email, My name is Dr Idris Rimi, Bill and Exchange Manager in Bank Of Africa Ouagadougou Burkina-Faso. In my department, during the Auditing of the year 2006, I discovered an abounded sum of €4.500.000.00 Pounds that belongs to our Late Mr. Morris Thompson, an American prominent man who unfortunately lost his life in the plane crash of Alaska Airlines Flight 261, which crashed on January 31st 2000. You may read more about the crash on visiting this C.N.N News internet website below.
http://archives.cnn.com/2000/US/02/01/alaska.airlines.list/
I desperately need your assistance to secure and move this huge sums of money left behind by my late client to the tune of €4.500.000.00, (Four million five hundred thousand pounds) out from Bank Of Africa Ouagadougou Burkina Faso to your own account, he executed contract through Department of Work and Housing here in Ouagadougou Burkina-Faso and the mentioned money above is his money left in our bank before his death. Meanwhile, for your smoothness of this transaction, I will pay you 30% of the total sum for your co-operation in this matter. If you know that you are interested and capable to handle this business transaction, come up with the information's showed below:-
1. Your Full Name:
2. Your Contact Cell Phone Number:
3. Your Age:
4. Your Sex:
5. Your Occupations:
6. Your Country and City:
As soon as possible all these information's is submitted to me, I will
immediately draft an application form with all your information's and send
back to you, so that you will proceed with the transaction by sending the
form to BOA bank for the transferring of this fund into your account.
Yours Faithfully,
DR IDRIS RIMI.
Holy Crap! Idris, you lousy bastard! Do you want a stool sample, too?
This whole plan sounds like it's plummeting to earth faster than Canada's Kyoto commitments.
You need someone more dark, more black ops than me to make this crazy scheme work. You need a Cheney, a dark and evil oozing menace, who's able to play rough, who can shoot his best friend in the face without blinking or thought.
Me, I'm too far gone for this. I like the quiet life now, I can't do the violence anymore. Maybe that's just my fat belly and the rum talking. And the Diet Coke.
But good luck, pally. You'll need it.
Salut.
John
Friday, April 13, 2007
The Spam Chronicles 6
!!!!!!!!CONGRATULATION!!!!!!!!!
UNITED KINGDOM IN COLABRATION WITH GOLD MINING COMPANY.
LONDON MILLION INT & NATIONAL LOTTERY PROMOTION
OUAGADOUGOU BURKINA FASO,12th AVENUE KWAME NKRUMAH 01 BP .
WINNER- REF: LP/26510460037/03.
BATCH: 24/00319/IPE
http://www.WorldWideLotto.com
WINNING/AWARD FINAL NOTIFICATION
It is our pleasure to inform you of the declaration and aof winners of the LONDON MILLION INT LOTTERY AWARD held on 10TH of Decembre 2006.Having picked your mail address by our electronic web site visitors collectors in-recognition of your patronage to the Internet services.
In the final draw,your name was attached to ticket number 6325698-44596-222,
with serial number 410-32659,draw lucky numbers 4014-236985744-596 which consequently won in the 2nd category.
You have therefore been approved for a lump sum pay out of
$1,000,000.00 ONE MILLION UNITED STATE DOLLARS), In cash accredited file No:LP/26510460037/03. This is from a Total Cash Prize of
($48,400,000,000.00 FOURTY EIGHT BILLION FOUR HUNDRED MILLION U.S DOLLARS) shared among the 22 International Countries in this category. All participants were selected through a computer ballot system drawn from 25,000 names from Africa, Australia, New Zealand, America,Europe,North America and Asia as part of International Promotions Program that is conducted annually to encourage the use of Internet and Internet based programs. We are delighted to express our heartfelt congratulations to you.
We hope that with a fraction of your wining money,you will be able to assist the less privilege in your society and also participate in our next year high stakes promotions of Euro 100 million International Lottery.
For your information on how you will start the Processing and remittance of your prize money to your designated account of your choice.
Please contact the claiming Manager stated below to receive your winning Money immediately:
NATIONAL LOTTERY PROMOTIONS/PRIZE GIVING AWARD
12TH.AVENUE KWAME N'KRUMAH,
OUAGADOUGOU,BURKINA-FASO.
NAME: MR.Mohammed Salif.
Email: claiiming_manager_bfs226@gawab.com
Remember,all prize money must be claimed not later than 15th Apr. 2007.
After this duration,all funds will be returned to the Ministry of Economic Affairs as unclaimed.
NOTE: In order to avoid unnecessary delays and complications, please remember to quote your reference and batch numbers in every one of your correspondences with us or to our coordinate sponsor's bank. Should there be any change of your address, do inform the claiming Manager to process your transaction as soon as possible.
!!!CONGRATULATION!!!
Congratulations from all our staff and thank you for being part of our promotions program.
Any breach of confidentiality on the part of the winners will result to disqualification.
We wish you continued good fortunes.
Best Wishes.
The Management,
Lottery Organisation.
Dear Mr. Salif,
!!!!!!!!!!WOW!!!!!!!!!
How lucky can I guy get? This is the fourth lottery I've won this month! Or is it the fifth?
!!!!!WHO CARES!!!!!!
Surfing all those porn sites is finally paying off for me!
But wait -- you say that "[a]ny breach of confidentiality on the part of the winners will result to disqualification." You mean I can't even tell my 83 year-old mother that I've won? Won't she get suspicious when I star running over tree-huggers in my new Hummer?
Yours,
John
UNITED KINGDOM IN COLABRATION WITH GOLD MINING COMPANY.
LONDON MILLION INT & NATIONAL LOTTERY PROMOTION
OUAGADOUGOU BURKINA FASO,12th AVENUE KWAME NKRUMAH 01 BP .
WINNER- REF: LP/26510460037/03.
BATCH: 24/00319/IPE
http://www.WorldWideLotto.com
WINNING/AWARD FINAL NOTIFICATION
It is our pleasure to inform you of the declaration and aof winners of the LONDON MILLION INT LOTTERY AWARD held on 10TH of Decembre 2006.Having picked your mail address by our electronic web site visitors collectors in-recognition of your patronage to the Internet services.
In the final draw,your name was attached to ticket number 6325698-44596-222,
with serial number 410-32659,draw lucky numbers 4014-236985744-596 which consequently won in the 2nd category.
You have therefore been approved for a lump sum pay out of
$1,000,000.00 ONE MILLION UNITED STATE DOLLARS), In cash accredited file No:LP/26510460037/03. This is from a Total Cash Prize of
($48,400,000,000.00 FOURTY EIGHT BILLION FOUR HUNDRED MILLION U.S DOLLARS) shared among the 22 International Countries in this category. All participants were selected through a computer ballot system drawn from 25,000 names from Africa, Australia, New Zealand, America,Europe,North America and Asia as part of International Promotions Program that is conducted annually to encourage the use of Internet and Internet based programs. We are delighted to express our heartfelt congratulations to you.
We hope that with a fraction of your wining money,you will be able to assist the less privilege in your society and also participate in our next year high stakes promotions of Euro 100 million International Lottery.
For your information on how you will start the Processing and remittance of your prize money to your designated account of your choice.
Please contact the claiming Manager stated below to receive your winning Money immediately:
NATIONAL LOTTERY PROMOTIONS/PRIZE GIVING AWARD
12TH.AVENUE KWAME N'KRUMAH,
OUAGADOUGOU,BURKINA-FASO.
NAME: MR.Mohammed Salif.
Email: claiiming_manager_bfs226@gawab.com
Remember,all prize money must be claimed not later than 15th Apr. 2007.
After this duration,all funds will be returned to the Ministry of Economic Affairs as unclaimed.
NOTE: In order to avoid unnecessary delays and complications, please remember to quote your reference and batch numbers in every one of your correspondences with us or to our coordinate sponsor's bank. Should there be any change of your address, do inform the claiming Manager to process your transaction as soon as possible.
!!!CONGRATULATION!!!
Congratulations from all our staff and thank you for being part of our promotions program.
Any breach of confidentiality on the part of the winners will result to disqualification.
We wish you continued good fortunes.
Best Wishes.
The Management,
Lottery Organisation.
Dear Mr. Salif,
!!!!!!!!!!WOW!!!!!!!!!
How lucky can I guy get? This is the fourth lottery I've won this month! Or is it the fifth?
!!!!!WHO CARES!!!!!!
Surfing all those porn sites is finally paying off for me!
But wait -- you say that "[a]ny breach of confidentiality on the part of the winners will result to disqualification." You mean I can't even tell my 83 year-old mother that I've won? Won't she get suspicious when I star running over tree-huggers in my new Hummer?
Yours,
John
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
The Spam Chronicles 5
My name is Mrs Helen Rossini Of Starco Uk industry.
Starco Uk industry is a Consortium of Export/Import industries Based in the United Kingdom but with Branches and Payment officers and offices all around Asia and Africa,USA,Canada,Israel and Russia. We are currently recruiting payment officers in your Locality.
Your responsibility will be to:
a.Process payments and disburse to payment officers under you.
b.To maintain and update the payment website under which you man.
c.To send weekly reports on status of payments of transactions.
Job Requirement:
a. You Must Have a Bank Account with any financial institution.
b. You Must have access to the Internet at least twice (2) a Day to enable you give us proper update on payments.
c. You Must have a Direct Cell Phone to enable our customers call for verification before payments are made in your Favor.
d. Your Loyalty and Anxiousness toward this Job would attract increment in your Commission Charges.
If you already work and need something else to bring more funds,this is the offer too!
If you would like this send an email to the address below stating your interest and possible
qualifications.starco_industry01@yahoo.co.uk
starco_industry01@yahoo.co.uk
Hope to Read from you asap.
Regards Mrs Helen Rossini.
Dear Mrs Rossini
I'd love to help, but currently I'm working a number of shadey schemes with some bankers from Burinka Faso.
Thanks anyway!
Yours,
John
Starco Uk industry is a Consortium of Export/Import industries Based in the United Kingdom but with Branches and Payment officers and offices all around Asia and Africa,USA,Canada,Israel and Russia. We are currently recruiting payment officers in your Locality.
Your responsibility will be to:
a.Process payments and disburse to payment officers under you.
b.To maintain and update the payment website under which you man.
c.To send weekly reports on status of payments of transactions.
Job Requirement:
a. You Must Have a Bank Account with any financial institution.
b. You Must have access to the Internet at least twice (2) a Day to enable you give us proper update on payments.
c. You Must have a Direct Cell Phone to enable our customers call for verification before payments are made in your Favor.
d. Your Loyalty and Anxiousness toward this Job would attract increment in your Commission Charges.
If you already work and need something else to bring more funds,this is the offer too!
If you would like this send an email to the address below stating your interest and possible
qualifications.starco_industry01@yahoo.co.uk
starco_industry01@yahoo.co.uk
Hope to Read from you asap.
Regards Mrs Helen Rossini.
Dear Mrs Rossini
I'd love to help, but currently I'm working a number of shadey schemes with some bankers from Burinka Faso.
Thanks anyway!
Yours,
John
Friday, April 06, 2007
The Spam Chronicles 4
From Awanayi Kussi,
Abidjan, Ivory Coast
West Africa.
Dearest One
it’s my pleasure to contact you for a business venture which I intend to establish in your country, though I have not met with you before but I believe one has to risk, confiding in someone to succeed sometimes in life.
There is this huge amount of money United State Dollars (USD$11.500, 000.00) which I inherit from my late father, in a Security company here in Cote’d lvoire before he was assassinated by unknown persons.
Now I decided to invest this money in your country or anywhere safe enough outside Africa for security purposes. I want you to help me to transfer this fund into your country for investment purposes.
If you can be of assistance to me I will be pleased to offer you 10% of the total fund.
Thank you and God bless you.
Awanayi Kussi.
Yo, Awanayi!
That exchange rate must be a killer if you think that US$11.50 is a huge amount of money!
Better luck next life!
Yours,
John
Abidjan, Ivory Coast
West Africa.
Dearest One
it’s my pleasure to contact you for a business venture which I intend to establish in your country, though I have not met with you before but I believe one has to risk, confiding in someone to succeed sometimes in life.
There is this huge amount of money United State Dollars (USD$11.500, 000.00) which I inherit from my late father, in a Security company here in Cote’d lvoire before he was assassinated by unknown persons.
Now I decided to invest this money in your country or anywhere safe enough outside Africa for security purposes. I want you to help me to transfer this fund into your country for investment purposes.
If you can be of assistance to me I will be pleased to offer you 10% of the total fund.
Thank you and God bless you.
Awanayi Kussi.
Yo, Awanayi!
That exchange rate must be a killer if you think that US$11.50 is a huge amount of money!
Better luck next life!
Yours,
John
Wednesday, April 04, 2007
The Spam Chronicles 3
OFFICE OF THE DIRECTOR OF CREDIT CONTROL
INTERNATIONAL CREDIT BANK PLC,101-103 AVENUE,
KWAME NKURUMAH,OUAGADOUGOU
BURKINA FASO.
PHONE NUMBER: +226-7803-5295.
Date: MARCH 2007.
Dear Sir/Madame,
REQUEST FOR YOU TO STAND AS A NEXT OF KIN AND REPATRIATE 5.5 MILLION USD TO YOUR PRIVATE/COMPANY ACCOUNT.
I was mandated by the Managing Director of INTERNATIONAL CREDIT BANK PLC to ascertain your interest and capability to Co-operate with us in actualizing this highly rewarding project on repatriation of funds to your country. Are you willing to be presented as the bonafide next of kin to Mr.Floyd Tarantino, a crude oil merchant from Australia. Until his untimely death by the Tsunami Disaster in Indonesia, Mr.Floyd operated a fixed Deposit account of Five Million five hundred thousand United States Dollars(US$5,500,000.00) with INTERNATIONAL CREDIT BANK PLC.
Sequel to his death, the Bank made concerted effort to contact the immediate family in Australia in order to re-claim and transfer the ownership of the fund.
Unfortunately, the Bank discovered recently that the immediate families of the depositor Mr. Floyd were also drastically affected by the same Tsunami while on holidays. Apparently, the fund is now in full custody of the Bank. After a very serious survey, I and the CEO of the Bank decided to repatriate this fund to a trustworthy and reliable overseas bank account for high yield investment portfolios.
The modality of disbursing the fund will be discussed fully with the Bank-Account owner/provider, which we are offering you.
All the documents establishing the deposit of the fund and empowering you to be Next of Kin/Beneficiary of the fund will be perfectly secured in your name if interested in helping secure the fund. Transfer of this fund can be swiftly and successfully implemented within 14 bank working days if you provide the necessary overseas infrastructure required to realize the objective.
Please protect my position in my bank by keeping everything secret and confidential until we transfer this funds to your distination. Be kind enough to confirm the receipt of this message for more clarification.
Awaiting your reply.
Sincerely,
Mr. Simpore Hamado (JP)
Dear Mr. Hamado,
Holy crap, you bankers in Burkina Faso are a bunch of thieving little rats, aren't you? Are you sure you've never worked for RBC or TD Canada Trust?
You're trying to bilk the family of a Tsunami victim! Have you no shame trying to profit off the fatal misfortune of others? Who do you think you are, Donald Rumsfeld?
Futhermore, your plan will never work. I don't have any "necessary overseas infrastructure" for you to exploit, not unless you're counting that Meccano set that I left in England when I was five.
Yours,
John
PS. I need at least a 70/30 split before it's worth my while to even consider your ridiculous plan.
INTERNATIONAL CREDIT BANK PLC,101-103 AVENUE,
KWAME NKURUMAH,OUAGADOUGOU
BURKINA FASO.
PHONE NUMBER: +226-7803-5295.
Date: MARCH 2007.
Dear Sir/Madame,
REQUEST FOR YOU TO STAND AS A NEXT OF KIN AND REPATRIATE 5.5 MILLION USD TO YOUR PRIVATE/COMPANY ACCOUNT.
I was mandated by the Managing Director of INTERNATIONAL CREDIT BANK PLC to ascertain your interest and capability to Co-operate with us in actualizing this highly rewarding project on repatriation of funds to your country. Are you willing to be presented as the bonafide next of kin to Mr.Floyd Tarantino, a crude oil merchant from Australia. Until his untimely death by the Tsunami Disaster in Indonesia, Mr.Floyd operated a fixed Deposit account of Five Million five hundred thousand United States Dollars(US$5,500,000.00) with INTERNATIONAL CREDIT BANK PLC.
Sequel to his death, the Bank made concerted effort to contact the immediate family in Australia in order to re-claim and transfer the ownership of the fund.
Unfortunately, the Bank discovered recently that the immediate families of the depositor Mr. Floyd were also drastically affected by the same Tsunami while on holidays. Apparently, the fund is now in full custody of the Bank. After a very serious survey, I and the CEO of the Bank decided to repatriate this fund to a trustworthy and reliable overseas bank account for high yield investment portfolios.
The modality of disbursing the fund will be discussed fully with the Bank-Account owner/provider, which we are offering you.
All the documents establishing the deposit of the fund and empowering you to be Next of Kin/Beneficiary of the fund will be perfectly secured in your name if interested in helping secure the fund. Transfer of this fund can be swiftly and successfully implemented within 14 bank working days if you provide the necessary overseas infrastructure required to realize the objective.
Please protect my position in my bank by keeping everything secret and confidential until we transfer this funds to your distination. Be kind enough to confirm the receipt of this message for more clarification.
Awaiting your reply.
Sincerely,
Mr. Simpore Hamado (JP)
Dear Mr. Hamado,
Holy crap, you bankers in Burkina Faso are a bunch of thieving little rats, aren't you? Are you sure you've never worked for RBC or TD Canada Trust?
You're trying to bilk the family of a Tsunami victim! Have you no shame trying to profit off the fatal misfortune of others? Who do you think you are, Donald Rumsfeld?
Futhermore, your plan will never work. I don't have any "necessary overseas infrastructure" for you to exploit, not unless you're counting that Meccano set that I left in England when I was five.
Yours,
John
PS. I need at least a 70/30 split before it's worth my while to even consider your ridiculous plan.
Sunday, April 01, 2007
The Spam Chronicles 2
Mr.BUHARI TIJANI
The Manager of Audit & Accountancy Dept.
BANK OF AFRICA BOA
Ouagadougou, Burkina-Faso.
( READ CAREFULLY AND KEEP SECRET)
Greeting, and how are you doing? I hope fine.
Please let this my message do not be a surprise to you because i got your information and lay trust in you before i contacted you.
I am the MANAGER OF AUDIT & ACCOUNTANCY DEPARTMENT of our bank and i decided to contact you over this financial transaction worth the sum of TWENTY TWO MILLION,THREE HUNDRED THOUSAND UNITED STATES DOLLARS ($22,300,000.00).
This is an abandoned fund that belongs to the one of our bank foreign customers who died along with his completely family on 25th oct,2002 in a plane crash disaster. I was very fortune to came acroos the deceased file when i was arranging the old and abandoned customers files of 2003-2004 in other to submit to the bank managements accordingly for documentation purposes.
It is clearly stated in our BANKING FOREIGN POLICY and signed lawfully that if such fund remains unclaimed by the NEXT OF KIN till the period of SIX(6) years starting from the date when the beneficiary died, the money will be transferred into the BANK TREASURY as an unclaimed fund.
Besides,it is not authorized by the law guiding our bank for a citizen of BURKINA FASO to make the claim of the fund.
So the request of you as a foreigner is necessary to apply for the claim and transfer of the fund smoothly into your reliable bank account as the NEXT OF KIN to the deceased.
When the fund is transferred into your account,FOURTY PERCENT(40%) will be for you in an assistance and in provision of the bank account,while SIXTY PERCENT (60%) will be for me.
If you are really sure of your integerity, trustworthy and confidentiality,reply with your contact necessary for the transfer and call me as you so that i will let you know the steps to follow in order to finalize this transaction immediately.
I will be waiting for your urgent reply.
My. regards to you and your family,
MR BUHARI TIJANI
Dear Mr. Tijani,
Thank you for thinking me in regards to this matter, although I am at a loss to explain how you came up with my name.
Yes, I am really sure of my "integerity, trustworthy and confidentiality," which makes it all the more puzzling why you think that I would wish to be involved in a financial transaction which you freely admit is contrary to many of your country's laws.
Speaking of laws, it does seem strange that a citizen of your country cannot make a claim in cases such as these. What if the next of kin really is a citizen of Burkina Faso?
I didn't realize that the late Senator Paul Wellstone was a client of yours. He's the guy we're talking about, right? His was the only plane crash that I could find for the day in question.
I find it hard to believe that his family forgot about $22,300,000 that they had in your bank. I go crazy when I loose a looney! Also, aren't we rushing it? Even according to you figures, the family still has 18 months to claim the money before it's transfered back to the bank. Wait a minute -- why don't we tell the family about it? I'm sure they'll give us a big reward, and everything will be all on the up and up! We'll split the reward, but I'll take the 60% this time!
Yours,
John
PS. Aw, crap. I forgot to keep it a secret.
The Manager of Audit & Accountancy Dept.
BANK OF AFRICA BOA
Ouagadougou, Burkina-Faso.
( READ CAREFULLY AND KEEP SECRET)
Greeting, and how are you doing? I hope fine.
Please let this my message do not be a surprise to you because i got your information and lay trust in you before i contacted you.
I am the MANAGER OF AUDIT & ACCOUNTANCY DEPARTMENT of our bank and i decided to contact you over this financial transaction worth the sum of TWENTY TWO MILLION,THREE HUNDRED THOUSAND UNITED STATES DOLLARS ($22,300,000.00).
This is an abandoned fund that belongs to the one of our bank foreign customers who died along with his completely family on 25th oct,2002 in a plane crash disaster. I was very fortune to came acroos the deceased file when i was arranging the old and abandoned customers files of 2003-2004 in other to submit to the bank managements accordingly for documentation purposes.
It is clearly stated in our BANKING FOREIGN POLICY and signed lawfully that if such fund remains unclaimed by the NEXT OF KIN till the period of SIX(6) years starting from the date when the beneficiary died, the money will be transferred into the BANK TREASURY as an unclaimed fund.
Besides,it is not authorized by the law guiding our bank for a citizen of BURKINA FASO to make the claim of the fund.
So the request of you as a foreigner is necessary to apply for the claim and transfer of the fund smoothly into your reliable bank account as the NEXT OF KIN to the deceased.
When the fund is transferred into your account,FOURTY PERCENT(40%) will be for you in an assistance and in provision of the bank account,while SIXTY PERCENT (60%) will be for me.
If you are really sure of your integerity, trustworthy and confidentiality,reply with your contact necessary for the transfer and call me as you so that i will let you know the steps to follow in order to finalize this transaction immediately.
I will be waiting for your urgent reply.
My. regards to you and your family,
MR BUHARI TIJANI
Dear Mr. Tijani,
Thank you for thinking me in regards to this matter, although I am at a loss to explain how you came up with my name.
Yes, I am really sure of my "integerity, trustworthy and confidentiality," which makes it all the more puzzling why you think that I would wish to be involved in a financial transaction which you freely admit is contrary to many of your country's laws.
Speaking of laws, it does seem strange that a citizen of your country cannot make a claim in cases such as these. What if the next of kin really is a citizen of Burkina Faso?
I didn't realize that the late Senator Paul Wellstone was a client of yours. He's the guy we're talking about, right? His was the only plane crash that I could find for the day in question.
I find it hard to believe that his family forgot about $22,300,000 that they had in your bank. I go crazy when I loose a looney! Also, aren't we rushing it? Even according to you figures, the family still has 18 months to claim the money before it's transfered back to the bank. Wait a minute -- why don't we tell the family about it? I'm sure they'll give us a big reward, and everything will be all on the up and up! We'll split the reward, but I'll take the 60% this time!
Yours,
John
PS. Aw, crap. I forgot to keep it a secret.
Thursday, March 29, 2007
The Spam Chronicles
FROM: THE DESK OF THE PROMOTIONS MANAGER,INTERNATIONAL PROMOTION/PRIZE AWARD DEPARTMENT, REF: UKNL/26510460037/07.
BATCH: 24/00319/IPD.
ATTENTION: Sir/Madam
RE/AWARD NOTIFICATION: FINAL NOTICE
We are pleased to inform you of the announcement Today,27th March 2007, of winners of the UK NATIONAL LOTTERY, THE UNITED KINGDOM INTERNATIONAL PROGRAM Sheld on 1st March 2007 in Croydon,London.
You email address was attached to ticket number 023-0148-790-459, with serial number 5063-11 drew The lucky numbers 43-11-44-37-10-43, and consequently Won you the lottery in the 2nd category.
You have therefore been approved for a lump sum pay Of 500,000.00 British Pounds(GBP) in cash credited to file REF NO. UKNL/26510460037/07. To file for your claim, please contact our fiduciary Agent;
NAME: DAVID WOOD.
TELEPHONE: +447031923807
+447031972486
Email: davidwood65@yahoo.com.hk
Sincerely,
Dr. Silas Aston
Zonal Co-ordinator
Dear Dr. Aston
Thank you so much for sending me a Final Notice that I was a big winner in a lottery that I've never heard of. Or ever received a First Notice for.
Imagine my shock and when I heard that I had won without ever buying a ticket for this lottery! I must be the luckiest person alive! This is like waking up and finding a new car in my driveway with no idea how it got there, or waking to find that George W. Bush is President and having no idea why anyone with normal mental faculties would vote for him -- twice!
I look forward to my winnings. Please send them to me as soon as pigs learn to fly.
Yours,
John
PS. Your grasp of the Queen's English, particularly capitalization, is amazing!
BATCH: 24/00319/IPD.
ATTENTION: Sir/Madam
RE/AWARD NOTIFICATION: FINAL NOTICE
We are pleased to inform you of the announcement Today,27th March 2007, of winners of the UK NATIONAL LOTTERY, THE UNITED KINGDOM INTERNATIONAL PROGRAM Sheld on 1st March 2007 in Croydon,London.
You email address was attached to ticket number 023-0148-790-459, with serial number 5063-11 drew The lucky numbers 43-11-44-37-10-43, and consequently Won you the lottery in the 2nd category.
You have therefore been approved for a lump sum pay Of 500,000.00 British Pounds(GBP) in cash credited to file REF NO. UKNL/26510460037/07. To file for your claim, please contact our fiduciary Agent;
NAME: DAVID WOOD.
TELEPHONE: +447031923807
+447031972486
Email: davidwood65@yahoo.com.hk
Sincerely,
Dr. Silas Aston
Zonal Co-ordinator
Dear Dr. Aston
Thank you so much for sending me a Final Notice that I was a big winner in a lottery that I've never heard of. Or ever received a First Notice for.
Imagine my shock and when I heard that I had won without ever buying a ticket for this lottery! I must be the luckiest person alive! This is like waking up and finding a new car in my driveway with no idea how it got there, or waking to find that George W. Bush is President and having no idea why anyone with normal mental faculties would vote for him -- twice!
I look forward to my winnings. Please send them to me as soon as pigs learn to fly.
Yours,
John
PS. Your grasp of the Queen's English, particularly capitalization, is amazing!
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